Encountering the Crucifixion


This is the story of an experience I had on Wednesday night, August 15. I was sitting in the prayer room reading Matthew 27, and as I often do during key moments in the Gospels, I closed my eyes and entered into the scene in my imagination. I won’t claim this was any kind of open vision third heaven experience, nor will I claim that this entire thing is prophetic, so take it with a grain of salt, but I definitely ended up experiencing some emotions that did not come from me, at least in a small measure. In my imagination, I was watching the scene from heaven’s perspective:

I am in heaven with the angels and the Father, watching Jesus being beaten below us. The angels are silent in horror, and it feels like all of heaven is silently screaming, “NO! Not the Perfect One! Not the Righteous One! Anyone else, but not Him! Do you have any idea Who you’re abusing right now?” This is the glorious eternal Word of God, who shines in light and has eyes of fire. He is perfect, spotless, marvelous, glorious, and there he is, stripped naked, dripping blood, ripped to shreds, taunt after taunt echoing around him. These angels have spent their entire existence worshipping and serving the Son and gazing on his radiance, and now all they can do is watch.

Michael grips his sword anxiously. “Just say the word, just say the word,” he mutters. One word from Jesus would send the armies now poised on the edge of heaven swarming down to the earth to free him and strike in vengeance against his executioners. But Michael is restrained. All he can do is watch.

And how the Father suffers! Every lash of the whip cuts deep into the Father’s heart, and I feel it as well. This is his Son! The apple of his eye and the joy of his heart since eternity past, heart of his heart, Spirit of his Spirit, his partner in creation and redemption. And this Beloved is now receiving the brunt of every kind of cruel abuse and rejection.

And then it gets worse. The Father unleashes his wrath and forsakes his own. He is sitting on the throne, gathering every ounce of anger and judgment stored up from every corner of history and hurling it all down on Jesus like lightning. I can see the lightning flashing out of his hands as he screams in fury and agony. He hates what he is doing, but he is fully committed to doing it.

God, what kind of sick, twisted agreement have you made?

The accuser stands before the throne gleeful, lashing out every accusation against the Holy One. “He has lied, he has coveted, he has committed adultery, child abuse, theft, slander, rape, genocide, holocausts, abortion, blasphemy, pride, homosexuality, idolatry, witchcraft, injustice…” The list goes on and on. Every sin from all of human history is blamed on Jesus.

And the Father is silent. There is no intercessor to defend him before the throne of judgment. The Father cannot speak one word in his Son’s defense. Instead, he stands in agreement and continues pouring out judgment.

And Jesus! Hanging on that rough wooden cross, arms outstretched, completely vulnerable and abused and violated in every way. And he knows what is happening. This spotless, glorious soul feels his spirit overcome with the filth of sin without measure, smothering him like a living tar. And Holy Spirit, who from eons past has been his best friend and partner in every glory and every burden, abandons him. Jesus is completely alone, humiliated, cut off, tormented.

“ELI, ELI, LEMA SABACHTHANI?”

One last laboured breath escapes his cracked lips… and he is still.

The Father falls back on the throne, spent, empty. It is finished.

In the temple the veil tears, and in the cemeteries bodies climb out of tombs. Already what will be is leaking backwards through time. But the sky is grey, and the onlookers at Golgotha are silent.

“Truly this was the Son of God.”

Jesus’ body is laid away. The disciples cower in the upper room. I am with them. They are dumbfounded. I try to encourage them, but my words mean nothing to them, and they sound hollow even to me. There can be no joy today.

But then Sunday morning! The women are going to the tomb. I go with them elated—I know what has happened.

Oh, that glorious empty tomb, with the wrappings neatly folded on the bench!

And then – THERE HE IS! He is so beautiful, so ALIVE, every bit of skin restored and glowing. Just the scars remain, and even they are beautiful beyond belief.

Jesus, what was your first thought when you woke up in that tomb?

“It’s over. It worked. WE GOT THEM.”

Testimony Thursday: Healings, Prophecies, and Security Guards

I know it’s really bad form to start a series called Testimony Thursday on a Sunday, but these stories really did happen on Thursday and I just haven’t been able to get online since then. I did write this up on Friday morning, though, and I expect to usually be able to post regularly on Thursday nights. So there.

As I said in my last blog, we’ve started doing outreaches every Thursday afternoon on our day off. Yesterday about forty of us went to two malls to heal the sick, prophesy, and share the gospel. Within five minutes of getting out of the shuttle, still just standing in the parking lot, we saw the leg of one of our interns grow out and we prophesied over this random curious guy we met. And that was only the beginning.

Once inside the mall, my group almost immediately saw a woman wearing a blue dress with her ankle wrapped in a bandage, and two of the prophetic items on our lists were “blue” and “broken ankle.” We prayed for her and the man she was with, and her ankle got HEALED! As we were praying I got a word that she has a mother’s heart—turns out that although she has no kids of her own, she’s been (as I understood it) a foster mom to many and the theme of mothering has marked her life for years. So I got to bless and encourage her in that. The man she was with had “irreparable” back pain, so we declared that nothing is irreparable with God and we are still believing for his healing.

We also met an Orthodox Jewish girl from Israel, a rapper whose baseball cap was on my list, two Muslim women I prayed for in JESUS’ name (even though I was more nervous than I’ve ever been), and a believer from West Africa with whom we had a great conversation throwing Scripture back and forth.  Some of our other groups saw a lot of healings and connected with a girl who is so hungry for God and they’re keeping in touch with her, and the group that our two leaders were in actually got escorted out of the mall!

That story was pretty crazy. As I remember it, they were praying/healing/prophesying over someone working at a kiosk, when one of the leaders recognised a girl walking by. After talking, they realised that he’d prayed for her leg to grow out (it did) the previous week at a different mall. At the leader’s encouragement, the girl told her two friends about it, and he was about to pray for healings for the two of them right there but they were asked to leave the store they were in. So he prayed for both girls outside the store, and one of the girls had her torn ACL healed, and as she was freaking out and jumping around, a security guard came to ask all three of our people who were there to leave the mall.

So as they were being escorted out, they started prophesying over the guard, who turned out to be a Catholic believer and theoretically supported evangelism but not in his mall. He believed he was obeying God by making them honour the authorities, etc. So our people shared some stuff from Acts with him about preaching the gospel anywhere and everywhere no matter how many times they get shut down. They encouraged him to boldly share the gospel even in his own workplace, and his theology was getting pretty blown up. He still made them leave, though, and so they went and healed/prophesied/prayed/preached in Target and Chik-Fil-A instead.

So that was my Thursday.

Prep Rooms and Thursday Outreach

Hey, guys! I’ve got a few more fun little updates for y’all!

As an internship, we’ve added a couple new optional things to our schedule that are really challenging but really amazing. One of them is “prep rooms.” Every night during our first hour in the prayer room, we set aside a couple of the small side rooms to crowd into and pray in tongues for an hour straight to prepare ourselves to go into the main prayer room. Almost all of the interns have their prayer language (and the ones that don’t will be getting one soon!) and we are being encouraged to put it to use, to really align our spirits with God’s Spirit. It really is a pretty beautiful and amazing gift; I don’t know what I did before I got the gift of tongues in 2009. Actually, I do know what I did—I continually hit a wall of where I couldn’t sustain prayer and would just run out of words. I LOVE being able to pray in the Spirit!

One of the other things we’ve added is regular outreach every Thursday afternoon on our day off. Some of the guys started doing this on their own early on, and in the past few weeks it’s grown to be an official IHOPKC*/OTI scheduled thing for whoever wants to come, headed up by a guy from IHOPU who works with the outreach department an is really anointed for evangelism and healing. I went for the first time last week, and it was pretty amazing. We did it “Treasure Hunt” style, which means on the way there we were all asking God to give us pictures of things to be on the lookout for, ie specific clothes, locations, etc. We went to a local mall and broke up into groups of two or three, so I was with a guy and another girl wandering with purpose around the mall looking for people to pray for. We got to pray for a lot of people, and although we didn’t see any healings or salvations, we definitely got to see God touch a lot of people.

The girl who was with us had “leather sandals” and “pretzel” on her list, so when we saw a woman with leather sandals standing in line at an Annie’s Pretzel shop, we stopped to pray for her. We decided to wait until she had made her purchase, so as we were standing there leaning over a railing on the second floor, I saw a girl below wearing yellow flip-flops. “Yellow sandals” were one on the items on my list, so I left my partners and hurried downstairs to find her. By the time I got there she had disappeared, so I walked around the corner praying for God to show me what to do, and right there was a different girl wearing pink and yellow sandals standing in line at a different Annie’s Pretzel shop! The “coincidence” was too much to pass up, so I waited for her to get her pretzel, then explained that she had been highlighted on our treasure hunt and asked to pray for her. She was pretty excited and asked me to pray for guidance for her. I did, and we were both blessed as I went back upstairs to discover that in my absence my two partners had prayed for the woman in the leather sandals, her back had gotten partially healed, and they received a prophetic word for her which brought her to tears! God is so good. I am so excited to go back next week and be even bolder in praying for healing and in preaching the gospel. I never have shared the gospel with a stranger before, and maybe this is finally my time.

*I’ve been trying to refer to IHOP as IHOPKC now, because since they recently settled the lawsuit from the International House of Pancakes, part of the agreement was that they transition to a new acronym. One of the interesting tidbits I learned in the full staff meeting last week–yes, I count as staff. I feel cool.

Falling in Love with the Bible (and My First Forerunner Rant)

God’s been doing a lot of really good things with me since I last blogged. I feel like testimonies are being built that I will share later, but they’re still “cooking” right now. Suffice it to say that I’m very excited to see how God’s going to glorify himself in me.

In the meantime, I’m still reading ten chapters a day (six days a week), and am halfway through Colossians right now. I feel like the whole Word is coming alive in a way it never has before. I’m underlining and highlighting just about every other verse and feeling a little silly for doing so, but it’s all so good! I know that’s a “duh,” but for most of my life, it’s just been a “duh” because I know it should be a “duh.” When I get to the point where I want to read the Gospels over and over just because I love to listen to him laugh, catch the flash in his eyes, hear the alternating passion, joy, amusement, sarcasm, and sorrow in his voice, I know I’ve finally come into something precious. I’m not even talking about encountering the present-tense Spirit of Jesus speaking directly to me in the secret place. I’m talking about being as moved by the Gospels as I am by the Circle and being completely swept up into that world to feel right there with the characters. This is unprecedented for me.

And then, as sorry I was to finish with the Gospels and get into Acts, I quickly discovered that watching Holy Spirit partner with the early apostles is every bit as fun as watching Jesus screw with the disciples’ minds. And then I got into the epistles and quickly became a big fan of Paul. Friends of mine for years have called Paul their favourite writer or teacher, but I never really got it until the past week or so. Dang, the guy’s good. He dives headfirst into really complicated questions and lays them all out, all while exuding this overriding passion for the cross of Christ and the living hope of the resurrection that it’s given us.

The resurrection. There’s another thing. IHOP’s been giving me a lot of theology, mostly about the end times, that I’ve never really studied before, but as I listen to the teaching and immediately go into the prayer room to study it out for myself, it’s right there all over the place. Perhaps I’ll write some blogs later about the Bridegroom paradigm and how that’s revealed all over Scripture and why it’s absolutely crucial for the last generation, and about how the final revival and tribulation is going to go down, and why we need to start talking about and understanding the Millennial kingdom and our eternal rewards—guys, this isn’t a fairy tale, and it’s not just abstract theology that’s fun to debate. It is really happening, and it’s going down much, much sooner than most people realise, and there is a vital importance to being ready for it. I’m not just talking about the final three and a half years of the Tribulation. I’m talking about what God is revealing to the church now, in this hour. This isn’t just IHOP being IHOP, I promise, because even a month ago I was rather skeptical myself. But now I’m being awakened to it, and I have concluded that I don’t want to be part of “the rest” that in the very last days will have to figure all this out as it’s happening. I want to ride the crest of the wave at the forefront, and I want help the rest of the church get captured by this thing so that we can be ready to partner with Jesus when the tables start turning instead of being offended by a Warrior King that we don’t understand is really a Bridegroom.

Well, there’s the tip of the iceberg of my forerunner spiel. I’ll save the rest of that for a time when I can be much more organised about it.

Open the Floodgates

When I shut up the heavens so that there is no rain, or command the locust to devour the land, or send pestilence among my people, if my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.
(2 Chronicles 7:13-14)

For those of you who haven’t heard, the American midwest is in the middle of what is being described as the worst drought in a hundred years. Crops are being devastated, power is being lost, and the heat is becoming especially dangerous to children and the elderly. IHOP has been interceding for God to end the drought since last weekend (we jumped on this a little late, unfortunately) and on Wednesday night we got a breakthrough.

That night during the 8:00 intercession set we spent some time corporately praying out of 2 Chronicles for the ending of the drought. A few hours later, in the second hour of the 10:00 worship set, a spontaneous chorus was released that grew and grew until it launched the room into a 30 minute crazy dance party. “You have loved me so well, I’ve never another love so sweet. You have loved me so well, I’ve never known another love so great.” We danced ourselves into a glorious sweaty mess of JESUS JOY ‘SPLOSION till a good ten minutes past the time the next worship team was supposed to come on. Many of us hung out till about 12:30 still worshiping, even though we’re supposed to head back to the apartments at midnight. (The leaders gave us permission. There’s lots of flexibility for whenever the Spirit decides to knock plans out of the way.)

As I was exiting the prayer room with one of my roommates, I saw lightening crack through the sky. I was just enjoying God’s display of glory and didn’t even realise what it meant until a minute later when I felt the first drops. Within ten minutes the FLOODGATES HAD OPENED and it was pouring rain!!!! Interns came pouring out of their apartments to dance in the parking lot and laugh and yell worship into the sky.

As awesome as that was, though, the midwest is still in a heavy drought and still very much in need of intercession. Please join with us in praying that God would have mercy on everyone depending on the rain and send us what we need!

But now hear, O Jacob my servant,
Israel whom I have chosen!
Thus says the LORD who made you,
who formed you from the womb and will help you:
Fear not, O Jacob my servant,
Jeshurun whom I have chosen.
For I will pour water on the thirsty land,
and streams on the dry ground;
I will pour my Spirit upon your offspring,
and my blessing on your descendants.
(Isaiah 44:1-3)

Every Secret Motive

The Vision

Light flickers from every secret motive, every private conversation.
It loves people away from their suicide leaps, their Satan games.

Here I am, back to The Vision at last. I’ve been wanting to keep going on it for a while now, but I got seriously stuck on this line. Honestly, it scares me more than any other line in this poem. Light flickers from EVERY secret motive? Seriously? It sounds completely unattainable. I had no idea how to write about it. I knew I needed to take time to really ask God about it, so last night in the prayer room, that’s what I did.

I remember being about eleven or twelve years old, loving Jesus but not really knowing him or letting him transform me yet, sitting on the floor in my room, singing this song by DC Talk:

I keep trying to find a life
On my own, apart from You
I am the king of excuses
I’ve got one for every selfish thing I do
What’s going on inside of me?
I despise my own behavior
This only serves to confirm my suspicions
That I’m still a man in need of a Savior
–In the Light, DC Talk

Selfishness and impure motives are so deeply ingrained in the human heart, it’s a wonder we ever manage anything good at all. Humans are notoriously crappy at having truly pure hearts, especially when we try to purify them on their own.

“Who can say, ‘I have made my heart pure; I am clean from my sin’?”
(Proverbs 20:9)

Not to burst any bubbles here, but it’s impossible. And it seems that not even becoming a Christian fully rewrites our motivations. I know I still find myself stuck in the same old little prideful thoughts and selfish motivations. It sucks. And somehow I’m supposed to be “perfect as [my] Heavenly Father is perfect”? (Mt. 5:48)

I wanna be in the Light
As You are in the Light
I wanna shine like the stars in the heavens
Oh, Lord, be my Light and be my salvation
Cause all I want is to be in the Light
All I want is to be in the Light

There is only one source of Light in this entire universe. We need to stop trying to conjure up some kind of purity on our own, and instead turn ourselves over to the One who is longing to do this kind of work in us.

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.”
(Psalm 51:10)

We need to be renewed. And renewed. And renewed. Over, and over, and over. This is our only hope of ever having that holy Light burning in our every secret motive. It is not something we can ever,  ever attain on our own power. We need to be constantly refreshed in his grace.

We may never get to the point of being able to say, “I never have an impure motivation.”  But that has to be the vision. That is where the reach in our spirits is trying to get to. Because it is possible to get closer, and looking like him, walking in deeper unity with him, is what our souls crave. We cry out again and again, “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me! Give me your light and make me look like you!”

Because the more that Light is flickering in us, the more powerful that love will be.

We were once rescued by a pure, burning Love that snatched us out of darkness, and we become a conduit for that same Love to now rescue others through us. We will watch in wonder as the impossible, supernatural Light that we never could have attained on our own reaches out and snags people away from the edge of the precipice.

Remember that “holiness that hurts the eyes“?

This is what it looks like.

Schedule and Prayer Room Stuff

I probably won’t blog this frequently later on, but especially right now I know y’all want to know how I’m settling in and what this thing is going to look like. So I’ll give you a peek into what my schedule and prayer room time are going to be like.

We were given a master schedule to give us an idea of how our weeks will be organised, but of course it will vary a tad week to week. In general, though, a week will look like this:

Meals daily: Breakfast 7:00-9:30, lunch 12:30-1:30, dinner 5:00-6:00. These meals are not mandatory attendance.

Monday

10:00-12:30: Forerunner Curriculum class. This will be taught by one of three main teachers, with the occasional guest thrown in, and covers topics such as the Sermon on the Mount, the life of David, etc. We’ll stay on each topic a few weeks before moving on.

2:30-4:00: Announcements and teaching on tools for interacting with God in the prayer room.

6:00-7:00: Briefing. This is a meeting with our core group in which we get to share what God’s doing in us and hear our core leader teach and encourage us.

7:00-midnight: Prayer room. I’ll talk in a minute about what that time looks like.

Tuesday – FASTING DAY

10:00-12:30: Forerunner Curriculum class.

1:30-2:30: Herrnhut Work Day. We want to serve the staff of our apartment complex, so every Tuesday we’ll take an hour or so to help out around the complex.

3:00-4:30: Burn class with Corey Russell. This is often the interns’ favourite class. Corey Russell is a massively anointed teacher.

6:00-7:00: Briefing.

7:00-midnight: Prayer room.

Wednesday

10:00-12:30: Forerunner Curriculum class.

1:30-3:00: End times teaching. End times are a huge, huge deal around here. IHOP is called as forerunners to prepare the earth for Jesus’ return. And it’s sooner than most people think.

3:00-5:00: Prayer room.

6:00-7:00: Briefing.

7:00-midnight: Prayer room.

Thursday

Day off – no schedule – meals still available.

Friday

11:00-12:15: e12 groups. This is a small group (guys and girls, not core group) exclusively for processing and discussing what we’re learning about the end times.

2:00-5:00: Apostolic Prayer teaching and prayer room. This is a prayer time basically like a prayer/intercession set in the main prayer room, but led by interns, for interns.

6:00-midnight: Encountering God Service (EGS) at Forerunner Christian Fellowship (FCF). This is a little more structured like a church service—except not, because this is IHOP, so it’s a lot more like a conference session with lots and lots of worship and power praying. There is about an hour and a half of worship with probably some prayer for healing mixed in, then about an hour of teaching, then another hour or so of worship before the form transitions and the auditorium becomes the prayer room until midnight while the main prayer room is closed and being cleaned.

Saturday

1:30-4:00: Prayer room.

6:00-midnight: Service at FCF. Similar to Friday night, but is ordinarily a teaching series. Prayer room format 10:00 to midnight.

Sunday

No schedule in the morning; people are free to go to a local church or to the FCF service or to just sleep in. I’ll probably go to the KC Boiler Room as often as possible, unless there’s something special at FCF.

2:00-4:00: Life groups. This is the core group meeting with the ACL for teaching, sharing, fun stuff, or whatever.

6:00-7:00: Briefing.

7:00-midnight: Prayer room.

So there you have it. This is my second day on a normal week kind of schedule, and I’ve already spent around 12 hours in the main prayer room plus three or four in the FCF prayer room. It’s supposed to be around 24 scheduled hours a week in the prayer room, although you may of course spent every free minute there if you like.

On Sunday we spent some time in a teaching on consecration, which essentially means setting yourself apart in an uncommon way to the Lord. That was our first big day in the prayer room, and they gave us a packet of things to fill out—testimony, journey to IHOP, dreams for your life, plus meditations on various passages, etc. We won’t have nearly as many papers to fill out on a weekly basis, but they do give us some tools and goals of things to be doing in the prayer room when we’re in there every day. This week, we’re supposed to read Matthew 1 through Luke 16 (that’s ten chapters a day), read the first three chapters of a book about fasting, and memorise and meditate on Matthew 5:11-12. Their goal is to schedule your entire time in the prayer room so you’re never just sitting there unengaged. I very much enjoyed going through the consecration packet and doing the readings and meditations. Of course, there’s also plenty of flexibility to spend time reading whatever portion of Scripture you want, praying however you want, dancing in the designated area behind the sound booth, and/or engaging with the prayer and worship being led on stage. The prayer room never has to be boring, because God is always doing something!

God’s been doing a lot with me so far. I’ve been filling up pages of my journal like mad. A lot of it is the kind of thing I don’t necessarily want to put on my blog, but here’s something a little more public that happened yesterday that was very impactful to me: When Misty Edwards was leading worship and Benjamin Nolot (The Nefarious guy) was prayer leading, I participated on the rapid fire prayer line for the first time. I got to pray on the mic and for about 15 seconds was leading the room and the entire webstream in prayer. I really didn’t want to go up, but God gave me a prayer and was urging me to do it, so I forced myself to get in line and pray. I’m so glad I did, because as I was sitting back down, God was showing me what had just really happened. Not only was it a significant moment of just obeying and thereby conquering the fear of man in me, but I got to be a crucial part of God’s assault on sex trafficking in the world. I think the worship team even picked up on something I said and was singing around it for a while. None of that would have happened if I had decided to blow off the moment and stay in my seat. Never underestimate the power of one little “yes.”

Here are a few awesome tidbits and notes from the last few days:

The wilderness is the place where God encounters us because he starves us out of every other thing until we have nothing else but him.

The substance of intimacy is knowledge. You cannot love a Man that you don’t know.

Submission to the call of abandonment from the attachments of the world. It is the journey where the old man is continually put to death within us. This is consecration.

“ONE man, ONE crown, ONE found worthy. (3x) His name is JESUS!” –a really powerful chorus (spontaneous and prophetic, as many choruses are on that stage) that got released during the last half hour of Ryan Kondo’s worship set last night.

Quickie Update

Hi all. Here’s how yesterday went:

In the morning we had a housing meeting with Megan, our ACL. I learned I CAN listen to “secular” music (whatever exactly that means) in the apartment as long as it’s in headphones and not out loud. I am content with this compromise. I still have a whole lot of thoughts churning in my head about how the spiritual benefit of a song is more dependent on the effect it has on the listener than the original intention of the song or performer. I can listen to a song about yearning for freedom, and although the songwriter may have written it more about travelling the world or something like that, I instinctively relate it to freedom in Christ. Clearly there are some songs with unbiblical messages, but there are also songs produced by the secular music industry (or by indie artists–how do you categorise those if they don’t make their ideological affiliation explicit?) that do have very biblically compatible themes, or are at least neutral. Even the neutral songs, when listened to by one used to seeing God’s hand in everything, can be very much something that brings one’s spirit into alignment with the way it was created to be. Let me say it this way: many of the “secular” songs on my playlists carry my emotions to good places, and make me feel more like the person I am meant to be. Whether or not they were written with the intention of communicating a biblical message or drawing the listener closer to God.

And that’s enough of that spiel for now.

In the afternoon all the interns played dodgeball. I was proud of myself– I threw the ball a few times, even if I never hit anyone.

After dinner we went to FCF for the service. Benjamin Nolot, the maker of the documentary Nefarious: Merchant of Souls about sexual exploitation in the world today (www.nefariousdocumentary.com), gave the message. He talked about “rebuking the oppressor” as God says to do in Isaiah 1:17.

Afterwards, intercession for justice broke out, let with prophetic singing by the worship team. I was crying in a way I haven’t for a long time, and in a way I never have before for this issue.

Then from 10:00 to midnight the FCF auditorium went into prayer room mode, more chill, everyone more or less doing their own thing with a worship team singing on stage, mostly spontaneously. It was a sweet time. 🙂

So, my Friday blog was incorrect– after a teaching on consecration in the afternoon, tonight is my first full six hours in the prayer room. It’s actually going to be two hours, then dinner, then six more. God’s already shown up in big ways for me– I can’t wait to see what he does when I place myself before him for that entire time!

Hello from IHOP!

I made it!! After staying a night with cousins in Colorado and a night with Erica (who was originally going to do OTI with me) in Kansas, I arrived at IHOP yesterday around 11:30 am. Some of my roommates helped me move in, and three hours later I was all organised and already feeling quite at home.

My little corner. I also have a bit of closet space and two drawers in our wooden dressers. I have since bought a desk lamp ($5.99 at Target!) since our room has no ceiling lighting fixtures.

My apartment consists of four interns in a bedroom with our Assistant Core Leader in her own room right next to us. We have a nice big living room and a “functionally compact” kitchen. The five of us are part of a core group which consists of twelve girls between the ages of 20 and 22, plus a Core Leader and an Assistant Core Leader. The fourteen of us will be discussing what we’re learning together, serving together, and keeping each other accountable. And of course praying together. 🙂 Both of our leaders are in our age bracket as well, and both have done the internship before. I am so excited to get to know them more and I think they are going to be great leaders for our group.

My core group is so diverse! Most of us are from the States, but we also have girls from Germany, Canada, Scotland, and India. And there are several more internationals outside our group, too. We are already having fun cross-cultural experiences with them, and I love listening to their accents. One of my roommates is named Kaylan, so I’ve begun introducing myself as “Caitlyn with a T.” As it turns out, she did a DTS in Kona, Hawaii where she was with a friend of mine from my home church! It is such a small world here.

So far, my days have mostly consisted of orientation. I feel slightly on information overload, but hearing the various leaders talk about the heart behind various rules and procedures makes them much easier to assimilate. Some of the boundaries might be a struggle for me at first — for example I’m typing this in the cafe because internet isn’t allowed in the apartments, and the dress code is a tad stricter than what I normally hold myself to — but I am willing to willingly limit my freedom for the sake of others in these ways, and also for my own sake and Jesus’ sake. If this is what it takes to honour the leadership, my fellow interns, and ultimately God and my consecration before him, then that is what I’ll do. I knew this was going to be a pretty intense adventure in consecration and humility anyway. So hopefully I’ll be able to keep that attitude for the next six months.

With all of this orientation information, I’ve been thinking the past few days about how IHOP is putting into practice 1 Corinthians 14:40, which says that “all things should be done decently and in order.” The “all things” Paul was talking about were the focus of the rest of the passage– namely, spiritual gifts such as prophecy, tongues, healing, etc, as well as things like singing in the spirit. IHOP is fully active in all of these, but they have established models that set boundaries so that the human propensity to act out of the flesh and end up hindering others from encountering God might be contained. Many of the boundaries are also rooted in 1 Corinthians 10:23– “‘Everything is permissible,’ but not everything is beneficial…” (NIV) There is soooo much freedom here, but that freedom is allowed to become a blessing to all because of the boundaries that have been prayerfully set.

Tonight will be my first official time in the prayer room… sorta. Tonight we’re going to the Encounter God Service at Forerunner Christian Fellowship, which is basically the side of IHOP that looks slightly more like a traditional church. It starts at 6:00 pm with an hour and a half of worship, and then an hour of teaching, and then prayer room until midnight, although tonight the interns will only stay until 10:00. Friday night is the time when the Global Prayer Room (the normal 24/7 prayer room here) gets cleaned, so the live webstream at ihop.org temporarily switches over to the FCF prayer room. The GPR is closed to the public during that time, although a worship team does keep going on stage in order to “keep the fire on the altar.” Then tomorrow will be my first official six hour session in the prayer room, 6:00 pm to midnight. I popped in for a few minutes today, and I am sooo excited to do it for real tomorrow night.

I’m meeting some people for dinner in the cafeteria in a little bit, so I am going to sign off for tonight. I’ll try to blog often —  I’m sure I’ll have LOTS to say — but no guarantees with how the schedule will go.

Kansas City or Bust!

I’m writing this from a hotel room in Richfield, Utah. Yep, it finally happened. I am ON MY WAY.

Also, it’s my birthday. Happy birthday, me!

I’ve been packing for a while now, but yesterday after church I finished up and had everything in Idris by 6:00. I was pretty excited to get it all ready that early. I finished out the evening by watching a new (to us) episode of Warehouse 13 with my daddy. It’s a tradition of ours to watch our shows together, and Warehouse 13 is one of our favourites. 🙂

This morning I said goodbye to him at 6:40 before he left for work–mmm, extra long daddy hug. My mom made me breakfast, and after lots more hugging (and maybe a few tears) I was off at 8:30. Not too shabby.

The road was very… long. And hot. And mostly empty. Thankfully, I had strong AC and a loverly ipod library to keep me happy.  (Hallelujah, my FM transmitter works beautifully!) I listened to a random mix of worship songs, then my Happy Mix and the live Joy cd from IHOP, and finally two messages from IHOPKC before arriving, safe and sound, at my hotel. Tomorrow I’ll chug on through to Colorado. 480 miles down, 1359 to go!

I gotta get all this in my car?! (Minus the big blue box. That’s full of all the fabric I’m NOT taking.)
Well, apparently it worked. Kansas City HO!
Hello, Arizona!
And hello, Utah! (I was in Las Vegas too, just missed the Nevada sign.)