Tag: 24/7 Prayer

Chicago Bound!

On By CaitlynIn IHOPKC Life1 Comment

As soon as I finish this blog post, I have some packing to do. Why? Because tomorrow morning at 5:30 I am leaving for Chicago! I am so excited to do this ministry trip with my IHOPU brothers and sisters. We’re going to pray and worship with churches and prayer groups in the city, especially at Moody Bible Institute, and really just come alongside and encourage what the Lord is doing there. He has such a big place in His heart for that city, and such big plans for His church there… I can’t wait to tell you stories when I come back!

Our theme for all of the spring ministry teams this year is Malachi 1:11–

“For from the rising of the sun to its setting my name will be great among the nations, and in every place incense will be offered to my name, and a pure offering. For my name will be great among the nations, says the Lord of hosts.”
(Malachi 1:11)

On Friday/Saturday we’re going to do a 24 hour “Prayer Burn,” in which we will basically do a 24-hour slice of what we do in the IHOPKC prayer room, with rotating worship teams, prayer leaders, etc. I was asked to be part of the Night Watch team for that, so I’ll be praying through the wee early hours of the morning! I’m also going to be singing on a worship team during the 6:00 a.m. set on Saturday morning. I’ve never done night watch and I’ve only sung on a worship team a few times (and never for the full two hours), so much prayer for grace is appreciated!

Also, please pray for safety on the road and throughout the trip! Idris (my car) and I are going to be driving a carload of girls on the long road to and from Chicago and throughout the week to our ministry locations. God has such big plans for this week, as we go to cities across America. Let’s pray for His purposes to be accomplished in and through us!

All you hashtaggers on Facebook, Twitter, and especially Instagram can follow all the IHOPU teams on their trips with the hashtag #IHOPUGO2014.

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IHOPU Ministry Trip: Chicago 2014

On By CaitlynIn IHOPKC Life3 Comments

Greetings, friends! A lot has been going on the past few weeks, but one of the most exciting things coming up is an IHOPU ministry trip to Chicago over April 6-13!

This time last year, I was at home in CA working at camp and looking at all the spring ministry trip pictures on Facebook. I am so excited that this year I can actually participate in going out to partner with the prayer movement across the nation. The vision for incense arising from every nation, tribe, and tongue is so much bigger than Kansas City. God is putting this fire in the hearts of believers all over the earth, and I am so excited to partner with what He’s doing in Chicago.

About thirty of us will be partnering with local colleges, churches, and houses of prayer, especially supporting the prayer group at Moody Bible Institute. We’ll put together several events for the community, including a full 24 hour period of prayer and worship called Illuminate Chicago, which we also did last year. I am so excited for this. Especially after my time at APU, I have a big heart to see college students throw themselves into a lifestyle of prayer and worship with expectancy for God to move.

The leaders of this trip put together a sweet promo video:

You can also find out more about the trip on the blog page HERE.

This is going to be such an amazing experience. I will so much appreciate your prayers for our team as we prepare for this trip, for the church in Chicago as they prepare to receive us, and for the hearts of all those God wants to touch.

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Monday Radicals

On By CaitlynIn Just Thoughts3 Comments

If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you may remember that about two years ago I started blogging through The Vision poem by Pete Grieg.  (You can see all my previous Vision posts HERE.) I haven’t exactly been keeping it up consistently, but I haven’t forgotten it either. This poem truly did inspire me at age sixteen with a vision of what radical Christianity looks like, and these phrases are still part of the spiritual scrapbook that makes up my life.

So here we go.

Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night.
They don’t need fame from names.
Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds chanting again and again: “COME ON!”

I know it. You know it. We’re always “radical” on Sunday night… or Wednesday/Friday/Saturday night, as your case may be. Hands raised, impassioned altar call, something moves deep in your gut, and before you know it you’re on the ground making grandiose vows, or jumping up and down in the midst of a sweaty swarm, shouting some lyrics about “glory” and “changing history,” most likely. And definitely something about “fire.”

I’m not knocking it. I’ve had more of those experiences than most, probably. In that moment, you have this vision that the next day at work or school you’re going to become this radical, healing, preaching revivalist – basically the next Todd White – and your entire city is going to get saved in a week. People will look at you as you walk down the sidewalk, some in awe, some in derision, but that’s okay, because it’s all for the Kingdom.

None of this is bad. I want that life. I do want to walk down the street and see heaven touch earth under my hands. I’m going to keep jumping and shouting and making those vows because my sincerity really does count to God, even when I don’t follow through the next morning as well as I wanted to.

Because that’s what usually happens, honestly. Big dreams the night before and then nothing the next day. What happened? Chances are, I was in it for the glory high, not the heart of God.

“Instead they grin quietly upwards…” I believe the secret is that simple. It can’t be about us. It can’t be that I want to be a revivalist because I want to be awesome like that and I want good stories to tell… I want to be radical on Monday, but if it’s all about me wanting a thrill, it’s going to burn out fast. Sure, God might still use me sometimes, but that’s because of His mercy, not because I’m actually aligning my heart with His.

I mentioned Todd White and provided a youtube link (which most of you probably ignored, so here it is again). One of the things I love about that video and from Todd’s ministry in general is that it genuinely is not about him. I know a guy here at IHOPKC who’s done ministry with him, and what has continually struck me from everything I’ve seen and heard is that Todd really does walk in humility and love. He’s so simple and unassuming. Just a random guy with dreads and a t-shirt who gives big hugs and believes God loves people.

Radical worship on Sunday that isn’t expressed in radical love on Monday isn’t radical at all. Anyone can get hyped up by an event. It has to be a day to day faithfulness, or else it’s nothing. Those old ladies in the back who have been praying faithfully and giving of themselves for decades, that’s what radical looks like.

I’m not in the least bit saying don’t pray for people on the streets. Do it!! But do it in love and humility with your eyes on Jesus, not yourself. Don’t do it just to get a great testimony to share. It’s okay if no one but God ever knows what happened. Seeking “fame from names” IS going to burn you. You were not created to live for your own glory. That was the problem in the Garden. Keep your eyes on Him.

That is the fuel that is going to keep you burning. At the end of the day, you’re not going to be judged by how loud you were, but how faithful to His heart you were. Keep your eyes locked on Jesus’ eyes of fire. Glue your feet to the ground and refuse to move. Get lost in those flames. Let His eyes burn away every other selfish ambition.

I promise, the more you’re in tune with His heartbeat because you’ve taken the time to stare into His eyes, the more “radical” your Mondays will be.

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A New Semester and the Harp and Bowl Model

On By CaitlynIn IHOPKC Life, Prayer and Worship7 Comments

My second semester at IHOPU began on Monday. This quarter I’m taking Foundations of Biblical Eschatology, New Testament Survey, and Forerunner Messenger Practicum. The Practicum is broken up into three rotations, one of which is Harp and Bowl (the model for combining prayer and worship that we use in the prayer room). For my other two rotations I chose Preaching and Teaching, and Writing, out of options including Social Media, Creative Media, and Drama. I know, I know, Drama would be right up my alley, but I already spent four years developing my personal philosophy of Christians in the arts. I would not be able to come into that class with an open mind. Besides, drama is already something I know I have. Preaching and teaching is almost completely new to me, and both that and writing are things I’m feeling called to step into more.

Also, as part of the practicum, I’ll be placed as a singer on a student harp and bowl team. I was on an intern worship team for about three weeks during my internship, but other than that (and one Sunday morning singing at The Refuge) I’ve never been on a worship team before. I am SO excited for this!

For those not familiar with the harp and bowl model, it’s drawn from Revelation 5:8.

“And when he had taken the scroll, the four living creatures and the twenty-four elders fell down before the Lamb, each holding a harp, and golden bowls full of incense, which are the prayers of the saints.”
(Revelation 5:8)

Anything that combines prayer and worship (specifically of the musical variety) can be considered “harp and bowl,” but the way we do harp and bowl is a whole structure that is designed to provide an atmosphere for maximum engagement in the room. Singing brings unity, and singing the Word and singing prayers from the Word–WOW!!

At IHOPKC, we mostly do two kinds of harp and bowl sets: worship with the Word, and intercession. Both are structured essentially the same, with times of corporate worship interspersed with times of spoken prayer developed by spontaneous singing. Here’s what your standard two-hour harp and bowl intercession set looks like:

Intercession set several years ago (old stage design). See that far right seat in the front row? That’s my seat. Every time.
  • The worship team consists of a worship leader on (usually) guitar or keys, at least three prophetic singers, musicians, and a prayer leader. At the start of the set, the worship leader will begin leading a familiar worship song as the rest of the team is transitioning onto the stage. We’ll have a time of corporate worship for 20-40 minutes, mostly consisting of worship songs that everyone already knows with maybe a bit of spontaneous singing sprinkled in as the Spirit leads.
  • When it’s time to transition into the prayer time, the worship leader will initiate several minutes of singing in the Spirit. (“What am I to do? I will pray with my spirit, but I will pray with my mind also; I will sing praise with my spirit, but I will sing with my mind also.” 1 Corinthians 14:15) At this time, everyone will sing at the same time, either in tongues or with whatever words of praise are on their hearts.
  • Then, the prayer leader will start leading intercession from the podium just off stage right. The musicians will usually start playing something with a more driving beat, and many people in the room will stand up if they’re not already to help themselves engage more fully. The prayer leader will choose a verse, preferably an apostolic prayer, and pray from that for 2-3 minutes. It may go something like this:
    • “Praying for the ending of sex trafficking in Thailand from Ephesians 1:17-19. ‘That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that you may know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints, and what is the exceeding greatness of His power toward us who believe, according to the working of His mighty power.’ So God, I pray that You would break into Thailand with the spirit of wisdom and revelation. Open up their eyes to see You rightly. Let the traffickers see who You are and be transformed, and let those trafficked see You and be filled with hope…”
  • After the prayer leader finishes “in the name of Jesus,” the singers will one by one sing spontaneous phrases inspired by the verse and the prayer. The prayer leader may interject phrases of spoken prayers to help guide the singers. It may sound like this:
    • “Oh, God, bring wisdom and revelation to Thailand…”
      “Wisdom and revelation…”
      — “Open up their eyes!”
      “Open up their eyes and let them see You…”
      — “Bring deliverance!”
      “Great Deliverer, bring deliverance…”
  • After a minute or two, the chorus leader (the first singer) will launch a short, simple chorus that the whole room can jump in on, and then will end with a name of God. Maybe something like:
    • “You are the God of justice
      You are the God of deliverance
      Open up their eyes
      Open up their eyes
      [repeat]
      Open up their eyes, oh God”
      [Note: I just made up all of these prayers and choruses off the top of my head, so what you’d actually hear in the prayer room may be quite a bit better.]
  • After the chorus, the prayer leader will either pray again, or another person will come up to pray, and the process will repeat.
  • At some point during the intercession cycle, the prayer leader will invite a time of rapid fire prayer. At this time, anyone in the room can come line up behind the podium to pray a short 5-10 second prayer on the chosen topic. Every ten or so people, the chorus leader will interrupt with a chorus the whole room can sing together for a minute, then the prayer line will continue.
  • After the line ends, the worship team may continue with a chorus, someone may feel inspired to sing a solo prophetic oracle for a few minutes on the intercession topic, or the worship leader may take the room back into corporate worship.
  • After another 20 minutes or so of worship, another intercession cycle will commence.

A worship with the Word set is essentially the same, except that instead of a prayer leader leading intercession, there will be a prayer leader guiding the team through meditation on a short passage of the Bible. Phrase by phrase, the singers will develop the verse (paraphrase, interpret, and expand it). One person’s insight will spark another’s, and as a corporate body we will go somewhere in the Spirit we couldn’t go alone. Singing the Word, whether in intercession or meditation, is the best way I know of to make it a part of you. You may forget the verse you heard in a sermon, or even the verse you read in your own Bible, but you’ll find it difficult to forget the verse you sang. The centrality of the Word is of primary importance in every harp and bowl set.

This model is incredibly flexible and is easily adapted to any culture or context. It fosters unity and an atmosphere of enjoyable prayer–and enjoyable prayer is sustainable prayer.

“These I will bring to my holy mountain,
and make them joyful in my house of prayer;
their burnt offerings and their sacrifices
will be accepted on my altar;
for my house shall be called a house of prayer
for all peoples.”
(Isaiah 56:7)

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+8 Days and Counting!

On By CaitlynIn IHOPKC Life

Yesterday was my one week anniversary of being in Kansas City. YAY! KC and I are pretty happy together and expect this to be a long-term relationship, so I’d say things are going well so far. 😉

I’ve been doing 6:00-9:00 a.m. prayer room every morning Monday-Thursday, and I have class at IHOPU at 10:00. That means I wake up at 5:00, get out the door by 5:50 to be early to the prayer room and get my favourite seat, then I’m in there for one full intercession set and half of a worship with the word set. Worship leaders this week have been Justin Rizzo, Jon Thurlow, and Tim Reimherr. I’ve listened to their cds but rarely heard them lead live, so that’s kind of fun.  I also love that the ACTS missions school students are in there in the mornings with me, as well as many IHOPU students, so I’m surrounded by plenty of fiery young people to help me wake up and get my prayer on. 😀

Then I come home and get to spend about 45 minutes eating breakfast, talking with whichever of my flatmates is in the kitchen, and reorienting my brain for class. My class schedule this quarter looks like this:

  • Mon/Wed 10:00-12:00 – Biblical Hermeneutics with Daniel Lim
  • Tues/Thurs 10:00-12:00 – Basic Christian Beliefs with Jono Hall
  • Wed 1:00-3:00 – Sermon on the Mount Practicum with Wes Martin and Dana Candler

I’m also going to have discipleship group meetings once a week, most likely Tuesday afternoons, plus regular service/outreach activities together, but I haven’t been assigned my leader yet. I am definitely looking forward to that, though. I know I want to devote some time to going out with the evangelism teams again at some point, and maybe also ushering and CEC. We’ll see how much my schedule can hold.

These classes are SO much fun already. Bible classes were always one of my favourite parts of APU, and it feels good to be back in the swing of analysing worldviews, doing exegesis, comparing hermeneutics, etc. I did of course get really good Bible teaching during OTI, but it was much less academic. And as much as I love that, I enjoy a little scholarliness thrown in the mix as well. It’s good to approach the Bible in a variety of ways.

I’m also looking for a job. I picked up a stack of applications from all over town that I’m working on getting filled out and turned in, so continued prayer for that would be awesome.

I finally put my keyboard on my desk and started teaching myself some worship songs on it. It is of course veeeeery slow going, but I really want to be able to use music more in my secret place times with God. I know how to figure out the notes and chords even if it takes me a long time, so I am slowly but surely trying to build the habits into my fingers. Maybe one day I’ll be able to post a video of something… even one of my own songs, perhaps? We’ll see. Don’t hold your breath.

All in all, this week has been mostly me figuring out what the upcoming months are going to look like, and I can tell you right now that my future here looks very exciting. I’m at one of the most unique places on the earth for pursuing the knowledge of God and I’m surrounded by passionate, fun, godly people to run with. God has provided for me so graciously already in so many ways, and I know he will continue to provide everything I need. I can’t wait to see what he has for me as I give myself to this thing.

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Choose to Lose

On By CaitlynIn Just Thoughts

Back to The Vision.

This is an army that would lay down its life for the cause.
A million times a day, its soldiers choose to lose that they might one day win the great “well done” of faithful sons and daughters.

What does it look like to lay down my life for the cause of Christ–the Kingdom of God?

It starts with a mindset that I am not my own. (1 Corinthians 6:19) I have been bought with a price, so my entire being belongs to God. Laying down my life only costs me the illusion that it was my life to give in the first place. He owns me, in the most beautiful way possible, and I want to cooperate with his ownership in every way I can.

For me, in my day to day safe little American life, literally sacrificing my lifeblood isn’t much of a possibility. But I want my life to be a sacrifice, not just my death. My life is my every moment, every choice. It’s sacrificing my time, my convenience, my comfort, to allow God’s love to flow through me.

It’s embracing humility.

Humility is so foreign to human nature. We naturally make our lives about “looking out for number one.” Embracing humility is perhaps the most counter-cultural thing we could do, but it’s perhaps the number one way to be like God.

“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”
(Philippians 2:3-11, emphasis added)

Jesus chose to lose in the most dramatic way possible. He who is El Elyon, God Most High, came so low to wash our feet.

God has honoured him for it, and he will also honour us for following Jesus’ example. I have a hard time imagining anything more beautiful.

“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”
(Matthew 5:5)

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you.”
(1 Peter 5:6)

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The Road Home: The Birth of a Dream

On By CaitlynIn IHOPKC Life3 Comments

Hi, all. So it’s been nearly two months since my last post… my bad. I’ve been back working at my outdoor science school in the mountains of SoCal for about six weeks now. I love being here. I work with some completely amazing people who inspire me every single day. It definitely does feel like being home, and I’ve loved discovering what God has in store for me during this season.

I know I’ve been mentioning going back to Kansas City in the near future. Yep, I am going back in August to start IHOPU, even though when I started OTI I had ZERO intention of that happening! Here’s the story of how that changed.

One Tuesday morning in the internship, we had a class on Joel and what it says about the role of the church in the period of history in which Jesus returns. (Hint: our main role is to PRAY.) At one point, our teacher asked us to name different verses about the end-time praying church. We shouted out references like Revelation 22:17, Isaiah 42, and Luke 18:6-8, and like a diligent student I scribbled them all down in my notes.

That night in the prayer room, at about 11:30 pm, I decided to get started on my assigned meditation for the week, which was Luke 18:6-8.

“And the Lord said, ‘Hear what the unrighteous judge says. And will not God give justice to his elect, who cry to him day and night? Will he delay long over them? I tell you, he will give justice to them speedily. Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?'”
(Luke 18:6-8)

I didn’t even realise that it had been on the list in class that morning, so I looked it up and thought, “Oh, the parable of the persistent widow– I know this story. Pray persistently, I get it, yada yada… I guess I ought to do it properly, though.” So I started journaling through the passage phrase by phrase like I always did on my meditation verses. The first few phrases were simple enough, and I thought it was cool that the verse highlighted “day and night” prayer just like IHOP is dedicated to, but then I started getting confused.

“‘Speedily’?” I thought. “Since when does God ever do anything speedily? Okay, this is just motivation to keep praying, because from God’s perspective it’s speedy, even though from our perspective justice may take forever to come.” And then I got to “when the Son of Man comes,” and got even more lost. I’d read this verse hundreds of times before, and never understood why Jesus made this sudden abrupt reference to his return.

Then I thought, Oh snap, this just became an end-times verse, and it suddenly all made sense. When God stirs his church up to pray day and night, it is because he IS planning to do something speedily. This is the faith that he’s looking for when he comes.

And it suddenly hit me that this verse had been on the board that morning. I frantically dug out my notes, and there it was– end-time praying church, Luke 18:6-8.

As soon as all that clicked, I realised in shock,

This is our story. This is MY story!

This verse is the very reason I am sitting in this room right now!

I still love the way God blinded me to the reality of this verse for YEARS when it was staring me right in the face until the time was right to blow my mind personally and lead me into my calling. I am wholeheartedly convinced that in one way or another I’ll be a part of the house of prayer/praying church/forerunner movement for the rest of my life.

My immediate reaction was along the lines of, “This is what’s happening! Jesus is REALLY coming back REALLY soon and the very fact that the Spirit is stirring us up with faith to pray day and night means that he’s coming SPEEDILY to bring justice to the earth and HOLY CRAP I’m right in the middle of it!!!!” I wrote in my journal that night, “He is looking for his faithful elect who will cry out day and night for the return of the Son of Man, the Righteous Judge.”

And the path that was instantly crystal clear to me was to come back to Cali, work at camp for a while, while keeping up with IHOPU online, and then return to start Year 2 in the fall. I’ve been figuring out some of the details, but I haven’t deviated from that plan since.

I’ll be working at camp till the beginning of June, then do a summer program called SEEP to catch up and be ready for IHOPU in the fall. SEEP runs June 17 – August 9 and I would (95% sure) do it online from Rancho. It’s a pretty intense program, especially since it includes 8 hours/week of required prayer room time. I’d probably do as many of those hours as possible at The Refuge, my local house of prayer. I’d love to also pick up a very small part-time job, possibly at the restaurant I used to work at. I could do SEEP in Kansas City, but I feel that doing it at home would allow me to 1) save two months of rent money! 2) get involved with an actual local church community again, probably The Refuge, 3) “test-drive” the lifestyle in a more “normal” environment, 4) get actual HOP experience outside of IHOPKC, and 5) spend more time with my family who hardly ever see me anymore.

At IHOPU I’ll be part of the Forerunner School of Ministry (FSM) and during years 3 and 4, if I stay that long, I’ll be on the house of prayer leadership track. Theoretically, after that I’ll go… somewhere… and plant a house of prayer.

So there are a lot of things that still aren’t perfectly worked out, but for the next few months at least I have my trajectory, and I am confident that this is what God is leading me into.

I would very much appreciate your prayers for the details to all work out, for financial provision (I may end up doing support letters this time, once I really get into IHOPU), and for me not to miss what God has for me in the here and now, even as I’m looking forward to the next season.

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Midpoint Update

On By CaitlynIn IHOPKC Life

Hi, all! Sorry it’s been a couple weeks since I last blogged… I haven’t really known what to write about. I’ve been journaling a lot, but so much feels like things I’m still processing internally and not quite ready to share yet.

We just had our midterm break, and it was relaxing and delightful (as well as productive!) but I’m really happy to be back in the regular schedule again.

Halfway through. More than. I leave Kansas City in less than two months.

I’m not sure that’s really sunk in yet. I’ll be glad to see my family again, but I will miss sooooo much about this place… the people, the prayer room, the learning, the freedom, the like-mindedness, the stretching… I don’t know what I’m going to do when I go home and life just goes on, business as usual. I’ve had plenty of times in my life when I get all fired up and then “real life” sets in, and I just sort of… dull down. I can’t let that happen. I WON’T let it happen. When I came here, I felt like I was giving up so much, and this was my “wilderness” season. Ha. This is the sweet season of abundance.

Misty Edwards sang an oracle last night (what I like to call a “prophetic shpiel”) that went something like, “Don’t look back and waste your life remembering the good old days. Nostalgia will kill you.” I pocketed that one, because I guarantee I’ll need it in about two months. I don’t want to spend my time in Cali moping and/or trying to recreate IHOP. Ain’t gonna happen. Good news is… Holy Spirit doesn’t just live in Kansas City. This place is on his heart in a very special way, but guess what… so is California. I don’t need to worry about losing everything I’ve learned and experienced here, because it is a part of me. The DNA of my soul has been rewritten.

I have been sensitised to recognise when I’m starting to get dull, and I have a bucketfull of simple, practical tools to combat it, and a track record that says I know how to use them and I know they actually work. I don’t have to be in the prayer room to intercede, fast, pray in the spirit, meditate, or sing the Word. All I have to do is carve out a little bit of time and space and lift my eyes.

The things that are so easy to believe at IHOP are equally true elsewhere. The things God is doing in this generation are global. He’s raising up a praying church to sing back the King… and Kansas City isn’t living in some alternate reality bubble where that’s only true here. If it’s true here, it really is true EVERYWHERE.

However… I’m also increasingly getting the feeling that my season here isn’t over yet. (I’ll tell that story in a later blog, because it’s still just in the beginning stages right now. [EDIT: HERE it is!]) I’m starting to make plans for coming back, but a lot of things will have to line up in order to make that happen. I’d appreciate your prayers for direction and provision as I begin to step into the next season of my life.
God is so, so faithful. Every day I find myself recounting to myself the stories of how he’s met me and provided for me in the past. He sees me, he knows me, and money has never been an issue for him. If he wants me back at IHOP, he WILL provide. And I get to partner with him in that by giving in faith that his promises are true. That’s just how the Kingdom works.

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Bringing Jesus Home

On By CaitlynIn Bible Stuff, IHOPKC Life2 Comments

The past few days have been wonderful, overwhelming, emotional… but it’s okay because I like crying. 🙂 God’s doing good things inside me, although I’m not entirely sure what yet.

On Friday night I attended a night of the Call2All congress hosted at FCF. It’s a gathering of church leaders from around the world to put together world evangelism strategies. (Check out Call2All on Facebook with pictures of the event.) At the service I was at, they talked about what was going on with world evangelism and told us about a meeting that happened at Amsterdam 2000 with a few hundred leaders of the world’s most influential ministries such as YWAM and Campus Crusade. They were presented with a list of a couple hundred of the world’s remaining unreached people groups and by the end of the day, they had divided up the list among them and committed together to reach them all. Ideas were flying, partnerships were formed and strategies were devised. The Body of Christ has been mobilised and no corner of the planet is safe.

Also, China is mobilising thousands of missionaries in a divinely inspired “back to Jerusalem” movement aimed at spreading the gospel throughout all the Buddhist, Hindu, and Muslim nations geographically located between China and Israel. I saw many prominent evangelism leaders on stage at FCF on Friday night (along with the governor of Kansas) joining hands with underground church leaders in China (although most of them couldn’t be on stage because being recorded on camera would endanger their lives) and committing together to do this thing. I watched spiritual history being made.

Let me slow down and explain what this means. This is not another “That’s cool, one more step forward.” This means that the finish line is in sight and the Great Commission is more than likely going to be FINISHED in our lifetime. These leaders are expecting it to be complete in their lifetimes, and they’re all 60-70 years old!

“Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
(Matthew 28:19)

“And this gospel of the kingdom will be proclaimed throughout the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.”
(Matthew 24:14)

“After this I looked, and behold, a great multitude that no one could number, from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages, standing before the throne… crying out with a loud voice, ‘Salvation belongs to our God who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb!'”
(Revelation 7:9)

One of the main things Jesus is waiting for before he returns is this completing of the Great Commission. And let me repeat—THE FINISH LINE IS IN SIGHT. We are no longer in the “drop in the bucket” stage. We are witnessing the beginnings of the final sweep of the gospel in the nations before Jesus returns. Very, very soon, we’ll be living in Revelation.

Jesus could very possibly, dare I say easily, be back on Earth before I have grandkids. That is not a joke or wishful thinking. That is the evidence of the signs of the times.

This is not the era of “someday he’ll return, won’t that be nice” like it’s a sweet fluffy little “happily ever after” in the vague future. No, one day SOON he’s going to SPLIT THE SKY and come with a roar and the sound of a trumpet. (Is 64:1, 1 Thes 4:16) All of creation groans for that day. This planet is on the edge of its seat, waiting for the revealing of the sons of God on the day when the Firstborn comes home. (Rom 8:19, 23)

This is what I’ve been freaking out about. I cannot possibly live a “normal life” in light of this. The only thing that matters anymore is preparing his bride, bringing him home, and seeing him face to face. What will he say to me on that day? Will he honour me by standing like he did for Stephen? (Acts 7:56) Will he give me the crown of righteousness for those who have loved his appearing? (2 Tim 4:8) Will he say “Well done, good and faithful servant”? (Matt 5:21) A thousand years for now, most of what I’m now filling my life with will not matter. What will stand when my life is tested by fire? (1 Cor 3:12-15)

Peter said we can “hasten the day.” (2 Peter 3:12) There are two specific ways I know of to do this: through prayer/ worship and fulfilling the great commission. He is raising up a 24/7 prayer movement of a lovesick bride crying “Come!” (Rev 22:17) and he is raising up a missions movement to carry his glory to the ends of the earth. (Hab 2:14) And now, he is joining them together.

“They lift up their voices, they sing for joy; over the majesty of the LORD they shout from the west. Therefore in the east give glory to the LORD; in the coastlands of the sea, give glory to the name of the LORD, the God of Israel. From the ends of the earth we hear songs of praise, of glory to the Righteous One.”
(Isaiah 24:14-16a)

What will that look like for me? Do I join IHOPKC? Do I join YWAM? Do I live as an ordinary radical SAHHM (Stay At Home Homeschool Mom)? I don’t know. And for the time being, I am okay with that. There are a few things I know about my destiny. God’s been revealing these to me one by one, uniquely tailored to me. I was made to:

  • Pour out my worship like Mary of Bethany. (First Commandment)
  • Cast vision for who God is and what he’s doing. (Second Commandment and Great Commission)
  • Live with the clear endgame of Jesus’ return to marry his Bride and establish his Kingdom.

That is what my life is about. I want to bring Jesus home. And that day is suddenly looking very, very close.

People, get ready.

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Every Secret Motive

On By CaitlynIn Just Thoughts1 Comment

The Vision

Light flickers from every secret motive, every private conversation.
It loves people away from their suicide leaps, their Satan games.

Here I am, back to The Vision at last. I’ve been wanting to keep going on it for a while now, but I got seriously stuck on this line. Honestly, it scares me more than any other line in this poem. Light flickers from EVERY secret motive? Seriously? It sounds completely unattainable. I had no idea how to write about it. I knew I needed to take time to really ask God about it, so last night in the prayer room, that’s what I did.

I remember being about eleven or twelve years old, loving Jesus but not really knowing him or letting him transform me yet, sitting on the floor in my room, singing this song by DC Talk:

I keep trying to find a life
On my own, apart from You
I am the king of excuses
I’ve got one for every selfish thing I do
What’s going on inside of me?
I despise my own behavior
This only serves to confirm my suspicions
That I’m still a man in need of a Savior
–In the Light, DC Talk

Selfishness and impure motives are so deeply ingrained in the human heart, it’s a wonder we ever manage anything good at all. Humans are notoriously crappy at having truly pure hearts, especially when we try to purify them on their own.

“Who can say, ‘I have made my heart pure; I am clean from my sin’?”
(Proverbs 20:9)

Not to burst any bubbles here, but it’s impossible. And it seems that not even becoming a Christian fully rewrites our motivations. I know I still find myself stuck in the same old little prideful thoughts and selfish motivations. It sucks. And somehow I’m supposed to be “perfect as [my] Heavenly Father is perfect”? (Mt. 5:48)

I wanna be in the Light
As You are in the Light
I wanna shine like the stars in the heavens
Oh, Lord, be my Light and be my salvation
Cause all I want is to be in the Light
All I want is to be in the Light

There is only one source of Light in this entire universe. We need to stop trying to conjure up some kind of purity on our own, and instead turn ourselves over to the One who is longing to do this kind of work in us.

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.”
(Psalm 51:10)

We need to be renewed. And renewed. And renewed. Over, and over, and over. This is our only hope of ever having that holy Light burning in our every secret motive. It is not something we can ever,  ever attain on our own power. We need to be constantly refreshed in his grace.

We may never get to the point of being able to say, “I never have an impure motivation.”  But that has to be the vision. That is where the reach in our spirits is trying to get to. Because it is possible to get closer, and looking like him, walking in deeper unity with him, is what our souls crave. We cry out again and again, “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me! Give me your light and make me look like you!”

Because the more that Light is flickering in us, the more powerful that love will be.

We were once rescued by a pure, burning Love that snatched us out of darkness, and we become a conduit for that same Love to now rescue others through us. We will watch in wonder as the impossible, supernatural Light that we never could have attained on our own reaches out and snags people away from the edge of the precipice.

Remember that “holiness that hurts the eyes“?

This is what it looks like.

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