I do indeed still have more Pasadena stories to tell, but I’m going to skip ahead to the present to share something that happened just last week… but began that week in Pasadena.
During the Onething regional conference that my team put on in Pasadena, I met two guys who were from the Desert House of Prayer (DHOP) in Barstow, which is about an hour away from me in the desert. We kept in touch on Facebook, and soon after I came home the director, Trent Williams, invited me to come speak at DHOP at the end of June! They are a pretty small house of prayer and aren’t able to run many live hours of worship yet (though they are planning to activate a 24/5 schedule of prayer with the IHOPKC webstream very soon!) but every month they do a “sacred assembly” of 24 hours of prayer and worship with live worship teams and believers gathering from all over the high desert. This month’s sacred assembly was Friday, June 26, 9:00 pm, to Saturday, June 27, 9:00 pm, and I was invited to speak at a closing service on Sunday, June 28 at 6:00 pm. Additionally, they invited me to speak at Abundant Living Fellowship in Barstow for the Sunday morning service.
I got there Saturday afternoon during the 24 hour burn to help strengthen their worship and intercession as well as get a feel for what their community is all about. I saw a gap on the schedule from 2:00 to 3:00, so I volunteered to lead worship during that time. I led a solo devotional set on piano for an hour, and it was a lot of fun! I love spontaneously singing the meditations of my heart to God, especially out of Scripture, and forming new choruses that the room can join me in. During the last five or ten minutes I was joined by members of the 3:00 worship team, so that was officially my first experience of leading worship with a team of musicians. Whew! Later on, the director and I traded off praying during the intercession times. It was powerful to join Jesus’ heart in what He wants to do in Barstow.
Saturday evening I was hosted by a wonderful couple who opened their home to me and shared stories of their walk with God. I heard stories of dramatic salvation, conviction, guidance, radical hospitality, and God’s relentless pursuit of hearts. Jesus is awesome.
Sunday I showed up at the small church, which could seat about 40 people, at 9:00 for their pre-service prayer meeting. I felt right at home. The prayer with spontaneous worship continued till 10:20 or so, as people trickled in for the 10:00 service. Later as the worship leader led some corporate worship songs, since I was planning to preach about Mary of Bethany, I found myself wishing that he would play a song by Christina Reynolds called “You are My Great Reward (The Mary Song)”. To my shock, minutes later, he actually did!! I was so moved that Jesus would prepare the way by playing the exact song I wished for.
I had so much fun preaching on Mary of Bethany. I went through all three scenes of her life shown in scripture (Luke 10, John 11, John 12) and highlighted her repeated choice of Jesus as her “one thing” over everything else. Mary’s story has meant a lot to me ever since God started speaking to me about her at age 16. God really moved and touched a lot of people that morning, and the pastor said that it felt like confirmation of God calling their community back to intimacy with Him as their first priority.
After a delicious Mexican lunch and a few hours hanging out in the prayer room, the evening service began. An awesome worship team comprised of musicians from around the high desert area led us in powerful, exuberant worship, during which I threw hair and makeup caution to the wind and danced with abandon in the back of the room. I admit to looking a little bit like a mess by the time I took the mic a bit later, but I did at least put my shoes back on!
I had so much fun speaking to that group. I recast vision for the global movement of 24/7 prayer and worship that God is orchestrating in our generation, emphasising Jesus’ desire to be with us, His plan for the earth to reflect heaven, and His ultimate worthiness. It was a joy and an honour to encourage their community with what God’s been burning on my heart these last three years in Kansas City!
Esteban Vargas, the worship leader that evening who also pastors Redemption High Desert church in Victor Valley, put together this video of the event, featuring an interview with the DHOP director and me.
As I drove home that night, I felt like I was flying high on what God had done that weekend. He had met us in worship, shared His heart with us in intercession, moved through the messages, and bonded us all together as family.
One other thing – on Saturday morning on my drive out, I noticed this sign marking my freeway exit. Barstow Road is CA Route 247. Coincidence, you say? If you think that’s coincidence, you don’t know my Jesus. 😉
Click here to listen to my teaching on Mary of Bethany and/or get my written notes!
Tag: Jesus
Pasadena Ministry Trip part 5: Prayer Room and Pasadena City College
The continuing saga of my IHOPU ministry trip to Pasadena, April 10-20.
Two months later and there’s still so much more of the story to tell!
Wednesday was primarily a prayer room day for us. We started our day with the entire morning in the prayer room at PIHOP, then in the afternoon some of us chose to stay and some chose to go evangelise at Pasadena City College. PCC is the 10th largest community college in the United States. We connected with a Christian campus ministry and split into groups to go talk to students.
Often when I evangelise I waste so much time playing the “I don’t know, what are you feeling?” game. It’s like I think I need direct direction or permission from the Holy Spirit before I can talk to someone about Jesus. However, a while ago I finally decided to get over that and just… talk to people. It’s as simple as that. Just start a conversation, be friendly and casual, don’t be afraid to ask if you can pray, and trust the Holy Spirit to lead it.
My partner and I first talked to a couple of girls waiting for a friend to get out of class. One girl told me that her aunt had died suddenly only a month ago. It was her mom’s only sister. I told her that I could relate, because my aunt, my mom’s only sister, died suddenly a few years ago. I was able to pray with her for peace in her family.
When their friend showed up, we explained we were just visiting the campus, and one of the girls suggested we check out the new art building. Since we had no better direction to follow, plus the fact that I wanted to refill my water bottle (it was HOT!), we decided to take her advice. We wandered through the art building admiring the displays but not engaging with any conversations, but as we came out the other side we saw a girl sitting by herself studying in a courtyard. After discussing whether or not we should interrupt her, we decided to just go for it. We didn’t feel like she was being supernaturally highlighted in a dramatic way, but we both wanted to talk to her, so we decided to just see what would happen.
I asked if we could sit with her, and she was wary at first, then opened up when I explained that we were visiting the campus and just checking things out and talking to students. We chatted for a few minutes about the various programs and opportunities on campus, then my partner asked her what she was reading. Turns out it was a book called Lamb by Christopher Moore, an irreverent satire about Jesus’ childhood. For all its biblical liberties and crass humour, it was provoking some real questions in her. I was able to use that as an on-ramp share with her what the Bible says about the significance of Jesus’ life. I had preached the humility of Christ out of Philippians 2 just a few weeks ago in a class, and so that was the version of the story that came out of me. I talked about God’s desire for and reach for humanity, even though He is so high above the heavens that He has to humble Himself to even look at the created universe (Psalm 113:6), and Jesus’ lowering Himself from that exalted glory to become the lowest of the low, and therefore being worthy of the highest exaltation. I admit, I got a bit overexcited and long-winded, but my partner did a great job of following up by asking questions. The girl admitted she had never heard the gospel shared that way before. She wasn’t comfortable with allowing us to pray for her, but I know God is after her heart and won’t stop pursuing her.
Finally, we met a girl who was already a believer, and was very excited to talk with us about what God was doing on the campus and in the city. We prayed for her, and then she asked to pray for us! She said it was such a huge blessing to run into us. God sure does love to bless His kids!
That night we gathered in the PIHOP prayer room to have an epic prayer rumble for California with their community. When these people do intercession, they don’t mess around. Luckily, IHOPU students can pray as hard as anyone any day of the week.
That night felt very significant for me. The reason you don’t see me in line with the others in the above picture is that I was on the floor sobbing. It’s not often that I cry in intercession, but that night, it hit me hard. When I finally managed to catch my breath well enough to stand up mostly straight and get out several words in a row, I did grab the mic and managed to shout/sob/squeak out a prayer for Christian college campuses in California– APU, Biola, CBU, Pepperdine, Life Pacific, SDCC, Point Loma, etc.
I spent an hour pacing in the prayer room alone after that prayer meeting. “God, what the crap just happened?” I asked over and over. “What does this mean? Are You calling me to California?” God was mostly silent, but it felt like silence with a cheeky little grin. “Spoilers,” I could almost hear Him saying. I didn’t get any of the details I wanted, but I did come face to face with the fact that I do, in fact, have a larger-than-anticipated burden for my home state.
Hmm.
I wonder what that could mean?
Dancers Who Dance Upon Injustice
I’ve always wondered about the line “dancers who dance upon injustice” in the song “Did You Feel the Mountains Tremble?” by Delirious?. As a dancer for most of my life, I’ve often asked, what does it mean to dance upon injustice? I understand dancing to express something, but how can dance actually trample something down?
A few days ago at IHOPU, we held a 24 hour “prayer burn.” Live student worship teams rotated around the clock for a full day of continuous worship and intercession for the church in the middle east. During the second set of the burn, at 6:00 pm on Thursday, I was in the room doing homework when my friend Deni asked me to pray. I agreed and she put my name on the board to be third in line to lead intercession on the mic. I closed my textbook and opened my Bible to find a verse to pray. I was going to pray the good ol’ Ephesians 3:16 “might in the inner man,” but before it was my turn someone started playing the old favourite “Did You Feel the Mountains Tremble?”
I was already in the back of the room pacing with my Bible trying to get God’s heart for the church in the middle east, but for some reason I didn’t feel I was quite there yet. Then as the song progressed, something in the room started stirring. People started jumping. Eventually I set down my Bible, took off my boots and cardigan, and let loose in the back corner of the room.
About fifteen minutes later, while we were still dancing to the same song, I heard God speaking to me.
“This is what I want for My church in the middle east. Pray for joy out of Romans 15.”
Romans 15 is one of my favourite passages to pray for unity, but as I flipped to the page, I wondered, is Romans 15 even about joy? I couldn’t remember.
Found it.
“May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus, that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ… May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.”
(Romans 15:5-6, 13)
When it was my turn to pray, I got on the mic, read this passage, then began asking God to give the church in the middle east a supernatural unity for His glory, and the joy and peace that comes from the hope of the gospel. Echoing the words of the song, I prayed, “Let their streets resound with singing, and let there be dancers who dance upon injustice, who prophetically proclaim victory over injustice!”
That’s it.
Dance is more than self-expression. It’s also prophecy. When I dance in intercession, I am prophetically proclaiming what God wants to do in a region or situation. Sometimes my movements express something pouring out or springing forth. Sometimes nothing specific is discernible, but when coupled with a heart of prayer, dance prophetically proclaims our victory in Christ (both in the already and not yet) over every form of injustice and every scheme of the evil one.
That’s what I want to see in the middle east. In the midst of oppression, persecution, and injustice, I want the dancers to arise who will declare the hope, joy, and peace found in the confidence of our victory in Christ.
Maybe you need victory in a certain situation in your life. Maybe you feel crushed by injustice. In fact, any form of oppression, be it emotional, spiritual, circumstantial, etc, is injustice, because you were not made to be kept down.
You want a breakthrough? Dance. Proclaim your victory in faith. Seize joy. Celebrate your hope with confidence in who Christ is.
Dance upon injustice.
NOTE June 15, 2018 – 3 years later, this is still the most popular post on my blog. Wow! My name is Caitlyn, and I am a full-time missionary at a house of prayer in Dallas. That means I raise support to worship and pray in a prayer room. (Well, I also run a ministry school and do a few other things, but it’s mostly all about prayer and worship!) Check out My Story to get to know me, and please feel free to browse and explore the rest of the blog! I’ve also written a more recent blog about prophetic dancing for justice that you may be interested in: Dancing Justice. Blessings!
Praying for Revival at UMKC
As part of our House of Prayer Leadership practicum, my class (some 50-80 of us) is leading two hours of prayer and worship on campus at the University of Missouri Kansas City (UMKC) several Friday mornings this semester, taking turns by our small groups. We prayed for the “word of the Lord to run swiftly” (1 Thessalonians 3:1) through the campus, for strengthening for believers, and for salvation for unbelievers. We’re partnering with Luke18 Project, a nationwide campus ministry that seeks to establish a culture of prayer and worship on every college campus.
During the second hour of our prayer meeting, a number of students went out to evangelise on campus. I later heard one of the testimonies… my friend Elijah sat down with a UMKC student from India studying computer science. Over a 40 minute conversation, “what are you studying?” led to “what is the purpose of your life?” to which the student had no answer. Elijah shared his own testimony of purpose and transformation, and this student was intrigued by the claims of Jesus. He wants to give his life to Christ, but doesn’t want to make a commitment without giving it some serious thought first. They are going to continue to meet to discuss Christianity. Please pray that the Holy Spirit settles every fear and draws him into the love of Jesus unto salvation!
I’ve really felt an increased burden among IHOPU students this year for praying for revival on college campuses. Our generation of young adults is thirsty for truth, purpose, and love. We’ve been disillusioned by some of the things in our past, whatever they might be, and we’re ready to throw our lives into something bigger than ourselves. History testifies that every major social movement has begun in this age bracket. The harvest is ripe on college campuses across our nation. Are we willing to labour with the Lord in prayer and outreach to see them brought into their rightful place in the Kingdom? (Read more on “Why College Campuses?” from Luke18.)
This Friday, it’s my group’s turn to lead the meeting. It’s such a joy and honour to proclaim the glory of Jesus over this school, and to cry out that He would have His inheritance. I’m looking forward to what God will do!
Loving God Through the Trials
I’m going to be really honest right now. Much of this past year has been really difficult for me. I’ve had a lot of disappointment and confusion and hurt to work through, and I’ve cried more this year than I ever have in one concentrated period in my life.
God has been so, so generous and faithful to my heart through it all. He hasn’t given very many specific answers to my questions, but sometimes, when I get really quiet, He will share with me how He feels about how I’m handling this season.
Today, as I was once again reflecting with Him about how I’ve grown through all of this, I said, “At least I love You more now… I think. Do I really? I don’t even know how to measure that, but that’s all I really want. Do I really love You more now?”
In the next few moments of quiet, as I offered Him that question and listened, He began quoting to me the words of a scene I wrote last year sometime, before any of this happened. It’s a story about Miriam of Bethany and Yeshua of Nazareth, and this conversation takes place soon after Yeshua raises Miriam’s brother from the dead.
“Do you understand now why I had to wait?”
I nodded. “Some. You said it was for the glory of God, that the Son of God would be glorified.”
Yeshua nodded. “Yes. God was glorified today, and he will be glorified so much more because of this. I’m only sorry it caused you so much pain in the waiting. But Miriam—I am so proud of the way you refused to stay offended! You felt the doubt and fear and anger, but time and time again during those four days you pressed through and chose trust over offence. That delights my Father and me so much.
My stomach fluttered, and I looked down, then back up at Yeshua’s twinkling eyes. “I would have given up so many times, but I guess I’m just too stubborn.”
Yeshua threw back his head and laughed. “That’s okay,” he said. “Stubborn love is my favourite kind, because that’s what it becomes when it has an obstacle to overcome. The obstacles prove your love is real.”
“They prove my love to God? Doesn’t he know all things?”
“Yes, of course. But don’t you love me more now than you did before? Your love has been tested and strengthened and refined because we’ve been through something together. So it proves your love to you, and also to the world, because loving God through the trials is declaring that he is worthy of it.”
“And God is glorified.”
“And God is glorified.”
In the midst of the trial, when every circumstance is screaming that God let you down and that He doesn’t know what He’s doing, your stubborn, weak prayers of “God, I love You and I trust You,” are so powerful. They declare to you and to the world that even this valley cannot make God less than who He is.
Love in the midst of hardship carries a very unique kind of fragrance to God. I believe that’s why the blood of the martyrs is so precious to Him. What else can bring Him glory and touch His heart like one who chooses to love Him in a moment when they are given every reason not to?
I discovered that I do love Him more now, because my love has been tested and strengthened. I have walked through the wilderness and I have come up leaning on Him. (Song 8:5)
And God is glorified.
“But I have trusted in your steadfast love;
my heart shall rejoice in your salvation.
I will sing to the Lord,
because he has dealt bountifully with me.”
(Psalm 13:5-6)
Why Do The Nations Rage? (Or: Window Seat Reflections)
I always try to get a window seat when I fly. What’s the point of soaring over the landscape if you can’t enjoy the view? From 26,000 feet, all of civilisation looks so small. City blocks, suburban residential tracts, freeways, and farmland all look so flat. On the ground, buildings tower over us as a testament to man’s genius and progress, like the ancient tower of Babel. From the air, the tallest skyscraper looks like a mere speck on the surface of this massive planet.
“Then I considered all that my hands had done and the toil I had expended in doing it, and behold, all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun.”
(Ecclesiastes 2:11)
Sure, we’ve covered the ground with our cities and our fields; we’ve spread out as if we own the place. We’ve built our governments, our corporations, and our universities. We’ve chased after educations, careers, and relationships, and we’ve crowed proudly over every goal achieved. We’ve built our tiny little kingdoms, but viewed from far above, it seems so insignificant, like the boasting of ants. Somehow, the ants have the nerve to think that we are the masters of our universe.
How silly that seems from 26,000 feet.
“Why do the nations rage and the peoples plot in vain? The kings of the earth set themselves… against the LORD.”
(Psalm 2:1-2)
It’s quite bewildering, really. The ants have rallied together and shake their fists at their Creator. Most days it’s in the hidden thoughts of our own hearts, but some days we see it blatantly on the news, and one day it will become a literal army gathered on the plain of Meggido to war against the One on the white horse, the King of Kings. (Revelation 16:14-16, 19:19)
This is where humanity is going. Who do we think we are?
“Yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes… As it is, you boast in your arrogance.”
(James 4:14-16)
From God’s perspective, all that arrogance is as absurd as an ant declaring itself president, when tomorrow it could be stepped on and squashed. The truth is that “The earth is the LORD’s and the fullness thereof, the world and those who dwell therein.” (Psalm 24:1) We do not get to set ourselves up as masters of our own universe. We can’t even control the beating of our own hearts! Every breath is a gift from God, and every scrap of control we think we have is an illusion.
“Now therefore, O kings, be wise… Serve the LORD with fear, and rejoice with trembling. Kiss the Son…”
(Psalm 2:10-12)
There is only one proper response to this realisation. Humility. Worship. “You are God and I am not.” Bow low. Kiss the Son and swear Him allegiance. Confess the truth that He is Lord.
Yes, tremble, and realise whose presence you are standing in, but rejoice! Because you do get to stand in His presence.
We may be ants, but we are also kings and priests, sons and daughters. Alone, we are nothing, but He is everything, and we are with Him.
When I look out from my window seat, I see the world that my Father owns. I see the planet over which Jesus will one day fully manifest His rule. Right now, it may be full of the vain screams of ants, but it will one day be full of the swelling song of awestruck, adoring worship.
“From the ends of the earth we hear songs of praise, of glory to the Righteous One.”
(Isaiah 24:16)
Who is Jesus?
My cousin had a Bible study assignment to ask someone who they believe Jesus is. She told me my answer didn’t need to be elaborate, but what can I say, my heart was “stirred by a noble theme.” (Psalm 45:1) I just really like to write lots of words about Jesus. He is worth so much more than the English language can offer, but I enjoy trying. So…
Who is Jesus?
Jesus is the Son of God. He is the second member of the Trinity, which means that He is one with the one true eternal God– He is fully and completely God just as the Father and the Holy Spirit are God. He is also fully and completely human. He chose to become human when He was conceived in Mary, and even today He is a human forever in a resurrected body. (1 Timothy 2:5, Acts 1:11, 1 Corinthians 15)
“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God… And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.”
(John 1:1-2, 14a)
Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. No one can enter the presence of God except by accepting His sacrifice for sin in our place. (John 14:6) Not only did He willingly suffer the most heinous physical death ever invented by mankind, but He willingly bore the full brunt of divine wrath for all of the vilest moments in history–everything from an unkind word to the Holocaust–on His own soul. Only one who was fully God (and thus qualified to be a perfect sacrifice) and fully human (and thus able to stand in our place and actually die) could have done this. No other religion would dare to suggest that their god would do such a thing.
“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”
(Philippians 2:5-8)“He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed.”
(2 Peter 2:24)
Jesus is the Bridegroom. He has many names, but at the end He is most fully revealed as the Bridegroom coming back to claim His Bride and make all things right. (Matthew 9:15, Revelation 22:17) He burns with passionate love for His Bride, the Church, and desperately desires to bring all people into deep, eternal unity with Himself. He is kind, gentle, and tender with each of us personally. Everything He does in our lives and in the world is out of the purest, deepest love.
“‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”
(Ephesians 5:31-32)“For as a young man marries a young woman, so shall your sons marry you, and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you.”
(Isaiah 62:5)
Jesus is the King of all creation. He has power over everything–sin, sickness, demons, nature, humanity, everything. He created the universe and even now upholds it with the word of His power. (Hebrews 1:3) Nothing happens outside of His control, and He is the most noble, true, just, fierce, compassionate King who has ever lived. Righteousness and justice are the foundation of His throne. (Psalm 89:14) He alone is worthy to rule the earth forever.
“On his robe and on his thigh he has a name written, King of kings and Lord of lords.”
(Revelation 19:16)“Worthy is the Lamb who was slain, to receive power and wealth and wisdom and might and honor and glory and blessing!”
(Revelation 5:12)
Jesus is the Righteous Judge. (Psalm 7:11, 2 Timothy 4:8) He will not tolerate evil. He would be less than loving if He did. There is coming a day of holy, righteous judgment for those who stand against Him. (Psalm 96:13, Isaiah 66:16) He fights of the side of the oppressed and He wages war for the sake of humility and righteousness. (Psalm 10, Psalm 45:3-6) He will bring about the restoration of all things in the new heaven and new earth. (Isaiah 65:17, Acts 3:21, 2 Peter 3:13, Revelation 21:1)
“Then shall all the trees of the forest sing for joy before the LORD, for he comes, for he comes to judge the earth. He will judge the world in righteousness, and the peoples in his faithfulness.”
(Psalm 96:13)
Jesus is beautiful. (Psalm 45:2, Song 5:10, Isaiah 4:2) Everything about who He is stunningly gorgeous. His outrageous humility is beautiful. His scandalous grace is beautiful. His overwhelming love is beautiful. His lavish generosity, His pure truthfulness, His magnificent wisdom, His explosive joy–all dazzlingly beautiful, like a thrilling symphony of a trillion rainbow-coloured tones. He is worthy of all of our worship and all of our trust and all of our lives lived completely for His glory– because the extravagant beauty of His character actually deserves such an extravagant response.
“In that day the branch of the LORD shall be beautiful and glorious…”
(Isaiah 4:2)“My beloved is radiant and ruddy, distinguished among ten thousand.”
(Song of Songs 5:10)
“To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood and made us a kingdom, priests to his God and Father, to him be glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.”
(Revelation 1:5b-6)
I Am a Worship Leader, But Not Like That.
When we say “worship leader,” we usually mean the person on the platform behind the mic playing guitar or keys, leading the room in verses and choruses to sing to the Lord. Of course, that is a perfectly legitimate picture, but I submit that that is not the only way to be a worship leader.
I am a worship leader. No, I don’t lead music from the platform, but one of the primary goals of my life is to lead others into worship. I can do that during a music worship set from wherever I am in the room, and in fact I’ve had people tell me for years that the way I worship draws them deeper into worship. When I let loose and let worship explode out of every inch of my body, not only do I encounter God in a very free and dynamic way, but I release an atmosphere of freedom and encouragement for others to let loose as well. If I’m fully engaging I will provoke others and bring them along with me.
You know what I mean. Sometimes when you’re in a distracted funk, just seeing someone else locked in and worshiping with abandon will stir something in your heart and spur you to press in harder. And another day you will do the same for them. That’s the beauty of corporate worship. We all get to lead each other by example.
Of course, this must never be from a “look at me, follow me!” mentality. Leading others into worship is truly serving them, because we were all made to be worshipers. For the rest of eternity, our primary occupation will be worship. John Piper has famously said, “Missions exists because worship doesn’t.” Worship is always the goal of everything else we do in our Christian lives (which, by the way, is your ENTIRE life). And as friends of the bridegroom, it is our mission to point to Jesus above all else, that He would increase and we would decrease. (John 3:29-30)
Leading others into worship is also such a beautiful gift to bring to Jesus. As an individual, I can give no more than my all, and usually even that is a struggle. But if I can play a part in others giving Him all their all as well, then I’m actually giving Him more than I could on my own! This is one way I can multiply my incense.
Of course, this means so much more than in a music worship set. I want my entire life to draw people into worship That’s the primary reason I write this blog. I pray my words will draw you deeper into fascination with this beautiful God, leading you into a life of worship poured out.
Why? Because Jesus is worthy. He actually deserves our highest praises. His inheritance from His Father is the eternal love and worship of the nations. He deserves it, and I want to play the biggest part He’ll let me in bringing Him His inheritance.
HOLY SPIRIT
Put your hand on your belly.
In John 7:38 Jesus said that whoever believes in Him, “out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.” The next verse explains that He’s talking about the Holy Spirit. The word “belly” is from the King James Version, and most of your translations probably say heart, but the Greek word koilias actually means “belly.” In the Hebrew way of thinking, your belly represented the seat of your emotions and your deepest inner parts, the way we talk about the heart.
No, it’s not actually literal; of course the Holy Spirit is not squeezed inside of you next to your large intestine, but it does kind of make a lot of sense. We know that the belly is often the emotional centre of the body. Sure, we feel things in our heart, but we also feel them in our stomach. Your stomach’s tied up in knots. You have butterflies in your stomach.
Actors and singers know this too. If you’ve ever taken an acting or voice class, you’ve been told to “breathe from your diaphragm.” The diaphragm is the muscle in your abdomen that makes your lungs expand. I was always told, “feel your stomach expanding like a balloon.” I spent a lot of time in all my acting years concentrating on my belly as the centre of my breath.
That very breath in your lungs that fills your belly—what is it? Where does it come from? Genesis 2:7—it’s the breath of life. The Spirit of God.
“Out of his belly will flow rivers of living water.”
Right now, if you have believed in Jesus and given your life over to Him, you have that living water inside of you. Historically, “living water” referred to a river that was clean and flowing. Pure and moving. This is true of the Holy Spirit, but it’s also more than that. He is actually the LIVING. WATER.
You have right now the Spirit of God living inside of your body. You are His temple. You are the building that He lives in.
The Holy Spirit is not a force. I love to watch Star Wars and think about God, but the Holy Spirit is not the Force. He’s a Person. He has a personality. He has a mind. He has emotions. And He is the Eternal Living God.
And He lives inside of you.
1 Corinthians 2 says that no one knows a person’s thoughts except that person’s own spirit. Only you really know what you’re thinking at any given time unless you tell someone, right? Because you live inside of you. So only the Spirit of God can know the thoughts of God, right? BUT GOD put His Spirit inside of you. We have the mind of Christ. The Holy Spirit searches the deep things of God, and then He reveals them to us. It’s His favourite thing to do.
Put your hand on your belly. Close your eyes and picture the Holy Spirit dwelling inside of you.
The Bible uses several different images to talk about the Holy Spirit. It says that He’s like wind. (John 3:8, Acts 2:2) The very word “Spirit” in Hebrew (ruach) and Greek (pneuma) means “breath” or “wind.” Wind can be a cool, gentle breeze, or a mighty rushing hurricane. He loves like a hurricane.
He’s like water. (John 7:37-39, Isaiah 44:3) He’s like rain (Hosea 6:3), or like the ocean. When you go to the beach, you can choose how much you get in the water. You can get your toes wet, or you can go in up to your knees, or up to your waist, or even in over your head where you can feel the waves rhythmically pounding around you and the salt and sand and water rushing through your hair. (cf. Ezekiel 47) But even then, you’re still at the beach. You can never go to the bottom of the ocean floor, and you can never touch every drop of the ocean. You can never reach the end of God’s Spirit.
He’s like fire. The fire of God rested on the disciples at Pentecost. (Acts 2:3) The fire of God burns before the throne of God. (Revelation 4:5) God is a consuming fire. (Hebrews 12:29) When we pray for fire to come, that’s not just cool revival language. We’re asking for a Person.
So as you have your hand on your belly, pick one of those images of the Holy Spirit. Imagine that fire or that river living inside your belly. He’s here because He wants to be. He actually chose to live inside of you forever. This is the climax of the story of this age, not that God became a perfect Man, but that GOD. LIVES. IN. BROKEN. HUMAN. VESSELS.
Jesus said, “Nevertheless, I tell you the truth: it is to your advantage that I go away, for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you. But if I go, I will send him to you.” (John 16 7 ESV)
Having the Holy Spirit living inside of you is better than having Jesus in the flesh sitting in the chair next to you. Because if Jesus were all you had, you still couldn’t get inside Him and He couldn’t get inside you. You would have to talk the old-fashioned slow way, with mouths and words.
But the Holy Spirit, the very Spirit—the essence—of Jesus, lives inside you.
Talk to Him.
Monday Radicals
If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you may remember that about two years ago I started blogging through The Vision poem by Pete Grieg. (You can see all my previous Vision posts HERE.) I haven’t exactly been keeping it up consistently, but I haven’t forgotten it either. This poem truly did inspire me at age sixteen with a vision of what radical Christianity looks like, and these phrases are still part of the spiritual scrapbook that makes up my life.
So here we go.
Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night.
They don’t need fame from names.
Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds chanting again and again: “COME ON!”
I know it. You know it. We’re always “radical” on Sunday night… or Wednesday/Friday/Saturday night, as your case may be. Hands raised, impassioned altar call, something moves deep in your gut, and before you know it you’re on the ground making grandiose vows, or jumping up and down in the midst of a sweaty swarm, shouting some lyrics about “glory” and “changing history,” most likely. And definitely something about “fire.”
I’m not knocking it. I’ve had more of those experiences than most, probably. In that moment, you have this vision that the next day at work or school you’re going to become this radical, healing, preaching revivalist – basically the next Todd White – and your entire city is going to get saved in a week. People will look at you as you walk down the sidewalk, some in awe, some in derision, but that’s okay, because it’s all for the Kingdom.
None of this is bad. I want that life. I do want to walk down the street and see heaven touch earth under my hands. I’m going to keep jumping and shouting and making those vows because my sincerity really does count to God, even when I don’t follow through the next morning as well as I wanted to.
Because that’s what usually happens, honestly. Big dreams the night before and then nothing the next day. What happened? Chances are, I was in it for the glory high, not the heart of God.
“Instead they grin quietly upwards…” I believe the secret is that simple. It can’t be about us. It can’t be that I want to be a revivalist because I want to be awesome like that and I want good stories to tell… I want to be radical on Monday, but if it’s all about me wanting a thrill, it’s going to burn out fast. Sure, God might still use me sometimes, but that’s because of His mercy, not because I’m actually aligning my heart with His.
I mentioned Todd White and provided a youtube link (which most of you probably ignored, so here it is again). One of the things I love about that video and from Todd’s ministry in general is that it genuinely is not about him. I know a guy here at IHOPKC who’s done ministry with him, and what has continually struck me from everything I’ve seen and heard is that Todd really does walk in humility and love. He’s so simple and unassuming. Just a random guy with dreads and a t-shirt who gives big hugs and believes God loves people.
Radical worship on Sunday that isn’t expressed in radical love on Monday isn’t radical at all. Anyone can get hyped up by an event. It has to be a day to day faithfulness, or else it’s nothing. Those old ladies in the back who have been praying faithfully and giving of themselves for decades, that’s what radical looks like.
I’m not in the least bit saying don’t pray for people on the streets. Do it!! But do it in love and humility with your eyes on Jesus, not yourself. Don’t do it just to get a great testimony to share. It’s okay if no one but God ever knows what happened. Seeking “fame from names” IS going to burn you. You were not created to live for your own glory. That was the problem in the Garden. Keep your eyes on Him.
That is the fuel that is going to keep you burning. At the end of the day, you’re not going to be judged by how loud you were, but how faithful to His heart you were. Keep your eyes locked on Jesus’ eyes of fire. Glue your feet to the ground and refuse to move. Get lost in those flames. Let His eyes burn away every other selfish ambition.
I promise, the more you’re in tune with His heartbeat because you’ve taken the time to stare into His eyes, the more “radical” your Mondays will be.
